x this y or the z gets it

I’m going to preface this post with the no brainer that I am against all forms animal cruelty.  So much that, as much as I love them, I’m against the breeding of brachycephalic (read – smushy faced) dogs.  Even pedigree breeding is pretty terrible now that I think about it.  Long live the mutts and rescues! Part awesome, part amazing with a dash of incredible.

It also goes without saying that threatening to electrocute a puppy to make someone watch your ad is pretty shameless. Luckily, the following pre-roll ad from Nail Communications handles the tricky idea, and cute puppy, with humour that just about lets them get away with it.  It helps, of course, that watching long enough not to shock the pup also makes for a donation to the ASPCA.  Everydoggy wins.  Maybe every pussy too.

It reminds me of one of my favourite, controversial magazine covers by National Lampoon which has a slightly more upfront threat.  The dog giving that side eye really makes the image for me and saves it from being pretty horrific.  The ASME seems to like it too and voted it 7th in the top 40 covers of the last 40 years (in 2005 mind) though I’d like to think it’ll still be there when the top 50 of the last 50 years comes round.  Would be interesting to see if they’d get away with a cover like that these days.  In honour or National Lampoon, #aphotoadayofkermitinmay and my love of mashups/crossovers below is Kermit’s take on the shocking cover.  I could always do with a bit more attention too.

nationalkermpoon

i like short shorts

In keeping with the topic at hand I’ll keep this short (short).  Channel 4 is starting an online series of (short) shorts, coming in at just a few minutes long.  They’ve made a cheeky little ad (puns intended) to promote it with plenty of shorts (in the non-film sense of the word). 

WARNING : the following short(s) contain(s) bottoms and in some cases, may contain nuts *titter*

 

food, inglorious food

Continental Europe is so much better than us when it comes to progressive, environmentally minded ideas.  Particularly ones so good you wonder why someone hasn’t done them already (see Unverpackt). This means it’s unsurprising and annoying in equal measures they’ve found a way to utilise the misshapen fruit and veg deemed too ugly to be eaten even though they just end up being turned into poo(p [shout out to my American reader{s}]) 

It’s a great idea even if I’m not sure why we’re so hung up on what produce looks like.  You cut most of it up anyway and if Jamie Oliver’s shows are to be believed huge swathes of us can’t even identify fruit and veg correctly. Maybe you want a pretty fruit to take to school/work to keep up appearances but what you eat at home is your own business.   Saying that, the orange does look like its prolapsed (do NOT google that word if you know what’s good for you)

I guess we do have a similar thing in the UK with Sainsbury’s basics fruit and veg but the mixed peppers bags are ridiculous.  90% green peppers is not mixed, Sainsbury’s!  And who uses green peppers anyway?  Green peppers, if you are reading this, I do not like you and I don’t want to be forced into buying you.

PS while I’m firing off supermarket non sequitar, have you ever noticed how good supermarkets on the continent smell? And the produce is so vibrant and I am jealous and I want to move back to Italy.

PPS I like postscripts

 

sneaker freaker : a magazine review

sneakerfreakercoverTitle : Sneaker Freaker

Tagline : it doesn’t have one ;_;

Issue : 28

Price : AUS$10

Cover nice sleek illustration of an Air Max sneaker.  Typography heavy with the only white space you’ll really see in the mag.  This was one of four(?) covers. Chose this one because of the Air Max focus and it was the slickest/cleanest.

Shelf appeal : bought online but shelf appeal would be great.  It’s a mini/midi mag so would get front shelf placing which is always clever.  It’s the perfect size for creative directors to put in their (Cambridge) satchel so they can read it on the Tube, if they aren’t cycling to work of course or working from home (can creative directors work from home, is that something they can do?)

Layout and Design : total eye-gasm.  I’m sure its readers would hate to admit it but it’s more or less a fashion magazine cum catalogue so it’s heavy on the visuals.  Very little white space but full page images and big, bold typography give the eye a break (not that you really need it).  It’s just plan good and massive props to the designers/layeruppers because there are a lot of images to fit in, especially cut around ones.

Content : all sneakers all the time.  If you like sneakers and reading then you’ll love reading about sneakers in Sneaker Freaker magazine.  Same goes for those who like to look at or covet sneakers.

Best Feature : Feels like a bit of a cheat because it takes up half the magazine but, the (almost) complete Air Max retrospective is pretty incredible.  There are loads of images of Air Max through the ages and some interviews with collectors, designers and someone who is represented with a thumbnail of a dog (still haven’t worked that one out).  If you’ve ever looked at an Air Max and thought ‘that’s nice’ you need this feature in your life.

Best feature : the back cover is a four page fold-out ad with Godzilla AND the fifty foot woman in it. Amazing.

Worst feature : really pushing it to find one but with editorial and advertising content so similar you can’t always tell if it’s a picture feature or an ad.  You could say the whole magazine is advertising, or at least PR, if you want to labour the point (which I don’t).  Doesn’t bother me too much but you might hate it.

Rating : Full marks. Really want to subscribe but seems like the sort of gift that would keep on taking.  Seeing so many sweet shoes would just make me want even more.

SF

more awkwardreviews here

blast(oise) from the past(oise)

photo1(4)Last week I bought a Gameboy Color under the delusion it was some sort of thought experiment.  Wouldn’t it be interesting, I lied to myself, to buy an old Gameboy and boot up the copy of Pokemon Blue I kept for no reason (deep seated psychological issues aside).  Like some sort of digital time capsule, I mused, an insight into the terrible t(w)eenage years.  I would examine my choice of player name, the pokemon I used and what I’d called them.  I would peer into the pixellated psyche of my preteen self, I bluffed, and share the results.  People will love that, I just plain wrongly told myself.

I scoured ebay and bought one (well two,  I’ll be damned if I lose an ebay auction) and waited.  Not really that long and it isn’t an important part of the story so I don’t know why I mentioned it but here it is.  Flash forward four(ish) days to the hallowed beast’s arrival.  I assure you it was no coincidence the precious cargo arrived by myHermes messenger service.  The Gameboy Color (limited edition Pokemon version) is truly gods’ gift to man, and I mean the proper old school, ancient gods here.  Forgot the gift of life or fire, Pandora can go and jump, the real box of myth and legend is made from yellow and blue plastic and has Pikachu on it.  As I opened the box the clouds parted and the heavens opened.  Angels sang.  I audibly gasped.  There was a parade in honour of the very moment as it happened.  This is what Link must feel like I dementedly thought.  I also thought I probably shouldn’t have Coke(ca cola) for breakfast again.

GBC1

I cradled it briefly, much in the same way I had held my newborn godson, fear mixed with reverie, reverie mixed with fear.  I jammed the blue, Blastoise adorned, cartridge in its back (the Gameboy, not the godson) and held my breath.  Gameboy game batteries last about fifteen years (the more you know, huh?) and mine is a little older than that.  I slid the switch and the console pinged into life.  The familiar scene of a sparring Gengar and Jigglypuff played.  Joy levels achieved critical mass.  I anticipated the amazing, creative names I’d given my pocket monsters, VENAFART, PIKAFART, FARTLETT, I was nothing if not a mature child and lower case was not an option (seriously though, it wasn’t).  The battery, and therefore save function, was in working order. So far things were going better than planned but as I loaded the file disappointment set in.

GBC2

At some point I’d obviously decided to restart the game giving up soon after.  The present save file was of a player called RUNE, from that time I thought I was misplaced Scandinavian royalty, and had two pokemon, a Charmander and a Metapod.  My first ever ever pokemon, a Bulbasaur who evolved alongside me into Venasaur, was gone. Forever.  I dropped to my knees.  The skies turned black, the heavens opened (again) and a tempest fell upon me.  I howled in anguish, eyes to the sky, hands by my side having torn apart my shirt.  There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, the pulling of hair and beating of breast. Nah, jk I just turned it off and took some pix for Instagram.  I mean, what use is having something if not everybody knows that you have it?  I’ll just play through it again like any normal person in their mid-early-late twenties with two limited edition Gameboy Colors and a blog.

Can we just take a moment to appreciate the amazing design choice of putting the power ON  light in Pikachu’s cheek? Give than man, or woman, a medal.

 

zombie boy v2.0

Do you remember Zombie Boy/Rick Genest?  You do? Good. Well there’s a new heavily tattooed Canadian model on the block and he’s following closely in his footsteps/PR plan.  He’s even done one of those cool Dermablend cover-up videos.  I guess imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.  I’m sure he’ll get a few photoshoots out of it.  The fashion industry loves this sort of extreme stuff, the whole ugly pretty/pretty ugly argument, but is it worth having your face like that forever?

Have to say I prefer Rick’s video, and tattoos, but there’s something cool about Vin Los’ tattoos looking just like marker pen.  Also have to give the man some points for ingenuity for the chest hair tattoos.  If life doesn’t give you lemons, just draw tattoo them on.  Those Canadians, eh? (couldn’t resist that)